I’m seriously beginning to wonder if there’s a national “Bother As Many People In The Most Annoying Way Possible” day that I wasn’t aware of!
Normally we have one of the roofing scammers du jour or the nitwits from Rectum and AT&T trying to flog their amazing internet service upon me even though I’ve been thoroughly thrilled with Google Fiber ever since I was paroled from ever having to pay a single cent to Rectum or ring up what Rectum laughingly called “customer service” ever again!
Today is the first time I can remember my porch being assaulted four times in one single day by people I’d just as soon fall into a black hole once they’re on the driveway past the post box!
Yep, yet another delegation from Southern Premier Roofing (you remember them…they’re the ones that thought carpet bombing my post box with seven identical copies of the same mailer was a great idea) who got ignored completely for two minutes of them talking and introducing themselves (sorry mate, could totally care less what your name is…the one I have for you is much more memorable and colourful!) whilst Nicholas and I are actively having a conversation as he’s getting ready to depart for another week of training in Winston-Salem.
I thought they were bozos before but when it’s clear that I’m having a conversation with someone I care about far more than you on my own property, back your dumb self away from my property without another word and go try scamming someone else!
But the prize for stupid nitwits of the day has to go to AT&T who weren’t content with disturbing the peace of this house as I’m working on a client’s taxes once. Nor did these people stop at twice.
No…they went for the HAT TRICK just a wee bit this side of 1950 hours as it’s starting to get dark and I’m trying to put the finishing touches on the proof-reading of the returns so I can hand it off for review.
The first two times of me just flat out ignoring you should have been a clue! A really big clue in neon about fifty metres in height, in fact!
I’d also respectfully say that the last 20 times they’ve been here since the COVID lockdown when they’ve gotten ignored completely or gotten the occasional tongue lashing in conversation Labradoodle (it’s a *DUET*!) or me at various points begging them to never come round flogging their broadband internet service which is down most of the time and uncertain of operation the rest…that should be a clue for the clueless!
Since Rectum Liberation and Parole Day, I can count on two fingers the number of times Google Fibre has been off the air at the Nerdery in a way that I actually noticed it and one of them was because something decided that chewing on the fibre strung round the house was a wonderful idea and Google showed just how un-Rectum-like they were by giving me a very accurate service time and a wonderful tech who had us back on the air in about a hour.
But considering that my productive flow was just binned for the fourth time today, this time the door is opening.
Now, the current law on trespass does not allow the withdrawal of implied rights of access unless I put up a wall or a fence as if this is a warlord’s compound in the Middle East. The UK is *SO* much farther ahead of us in this regard…you tell the salesperson or the bailiff that you’ve withdrawn their implied rights of access and should they come round again, you can have them done for criminal trespass after warning.
No, this is one case where I think the Supreme Court’s interpretation of the First Amendment to allow these people to come to my home uninvited and unwanted and still pitch their scam or drop their litter either on my door or in front of it or on the post box (that’d be a violation of the Federal regulations governing access to the post box, BTW) is completely biased in the WRONG BLOODY DIRECTION.
Please don’t mistake my intent here…I love free speech and the First Amendment. So much so that I’m having a go at those rights right now, in fact!
But that shouldn’t be an open invitation to people I really, truly have no desire to give the time of day to much less even bother with their intrusions, disruptions, and littering of my home.
That’s not too much to ask for, surely?
Well, apparently not for MARTIN v. STRUTHERS (319 U.S. 141) in 1943 and generally affirmed ever since in cases involving door-to-door solicitations.
The Court felt that the dissemination of information whether it was wanted or not by the occupant (in this case, it was religious proselytizing and literature) outweighed the rights of the homeowner to have an enforceable peace in their own home and not be assaulted through the day of people demanding attention at the door.
While door to door distributors of literature may be either a nuisance or a blind for criminal activities, they may also be useful members of society engaged in the dissemination of ideas in accordance with the best tradition of free discussion. The widespread use of this method of communication by many groups espousing various causes attests its major importance.
MARTIN v. STRUTHERS (319 U.S. 141)
I’ll concede that clearly enough of my fellow citizens find these people and their activities of use but then there’s millions of people who think coffee is a wonderful thing to drink and both of those propositions are ones that I will never agree until my dying day.
The dangers of distribution can so easily be controlled by traditional legal methods, leaving to each householder the full right to decide whether he will receive strangers as visitors…
MARTIN v. STRUTHERS (319 U.S. 141)
But the only remedy the homeowner has is to accept unwanted strangers on their property and ignore them even as they disturb the peace of the home and some of them are very persistent for several minutes in spite of no answer to their demands for attention. That seems cruelly unfair for the person paying the bills to own a small parcel to call home wanting to be left alone from people who want to sell them something (don’t have money and I don’t buy on the doorstep so that’s a waste of our time) or preach their religion (my spiritual relationships are my business and not yours nor your concern), etc.
There’s a reason I’ve not bothered with a NO SOLICITING sign given the anaemic enforcement of trespass after warning against solicitors and the fact that they don’t bother to respect it when my neighbours clearly post NO SOLICITING/NO TRESPASSING signs in plain view.
It is what it is but sometimes I can dream that they’re walking across a minefield from the cul-de-sac to the door.
Unsuccessfully, that is. 😉
Sooooo…three interruptions by the same group of AT&T nitwits was three too many but at least they were smart enough to enlist a petite cutie to try to make the pitch this time.
Sadly, she doesn’t seem to be at all aware who is CEO and Chairman of the Board of the company she’s theoretically representing and she and her bearded partner tried to tell me that John Stankey isn’t still running the show. Well, that rather infamous memo from his C-suite sent to the AT&T employees seems to suggest quite otherwise.
Likewise, once again they tried the “we can take you off the list to be solicited” which is an outright lie.
I can think of at least 20 different instances since I’ve lived here where I’ve politely and/or occasionally begged them to do just that and as you can see from today, those small requests to once again have some measure of peace, control over my home, and privacy goes in one ear and out the other and I guarantee you within a month or so, I’ll have a new pair of AT&T nitwits trying the impossible of getting me to ditch Google Fibre even though what I have now is orders of magnitude more reliable, faster, and cheaper than anything AT&T has ever dared implement.
But the truly laughable thing was when that young lady was asked point blank why she thinks it’s a wonderful idea to be the THIRD PERSON from AT&T to disturb the peace of this home TODAY!
“Well, you didn’t answer the previous times…”
At which point she was told rather matter-of-factly that should have been the biggest clue possible that the occupants have *ZERO* interest in your product, your pitch, and frankly your presence on the porch ever again. As it has been every single time since I moved here in 2010!
I’ll give her mad props for being refreshingly honest if not completely clueless. And she was rather cute which is completely wasted on such a deplorable activity going door-to-door. I really hope she finds some gumption and finds something more productive to do with her life than being a serial harasser.
Frankly, if I didn’t have so many people who depend on my current wireless account with AT&T, I’d have chucked them in the bin well before I finally could consign Rectum to the dustbin of unpleasant memories in my life.
An account that only gives me anywhere from 1-3 days notice of what my bill contains before they commence raping my credit card to cover it from a company that I was just recently notified that I’m actually in both of the 2018 data breach settlement classes.
However, as I’m unlikely to be able to prove actual damages to them leaking very personal and damaging information on me to data brokers who buy and sell it daily so I won’t see a damned dime even though I should get at least something for the fact that I was apparently luckier than most in the affected class of litigants.
Does this sound like I really want to do business with AT&T?
Isn’t that enough for these people to go flog their unwanted wares to people who might actually care and stop wasting my time by disturbing what little peace I have in this world?
Today, apparently it wasn’t. And tomorrow isn’t looking any more promising, if I’m honest… 🙁