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Is it really too much to ask for some measure of peace and quiet in one’s home without being disturbed by idiots ringing the doorbell trying to flog some useless overpriced product on me when they have absolutely no chance of making the sale?

We’re almost to the two year anniversary of Spectrum Liberation Day when it was made very clear to the company that had tormented me with amongst the poorest customer service known to man for *30 YEARS* that I have zero desire to ever see or hear from their company again because they have zero chance of ever servicing my home.

EVER.

So of course they’ve been bombarding my postbox ever since with their junk mail and lately have been sending round the idiots in the neon yellow vests.

The last one that came round about three weeks or so ago got sent off with a flea in his ear when Mistletoe and Mocha serenaded him with quite a bit of loud barking at the little window next to the front door and clearly no human having any interest in opening that door or stopping them from having their fun getting all shagged out after a long bark.

When the lord of the manor makes eye contact with you and explicitly turns on their heel and shows you their back to go back to something actually productive like contemplating one’s navel…you’d think that and the dogs would be a clear enough hint.

Apparently that wasn’t enough because yet again I find a neon-clad nitwit from Rectum making his unwelcome appearance on my doorstep.

It’s not like they’re not given fair warning with this gift from dear friends who know me probably better than I know myself…

Once again, Mistletoe and Mocha give the guy a long serenade in B^# and then in unison turn round and show him their hind end which is very visible when they both curl their tails over their back.

Once again, I see who it is and that they have less than zero relevance in my universe and then go back to something far more interesting which was watching the controlled demolition of the span of the Key Bridge still draped over the bow of the Dali.

Truth be told, that demolition was mighty cool…you’ll definitely want to check out the replays!

But you’d think *THAT* would have been sufficient for him to stay away from my doorstep and my doorbell and go harass other people who he may actually have a better chance with.

So imagine my surprise when that same fool turns up two hours later right before the puck is due to be dropped at Madison Square Garden in another do-or-die tilt between the Carolina Hurricanes and the New York Rangers in game 5 of the second round of the playoffs!

If the guy is too thick to take the blatant hints the first time, he deserves the performance art that is coming his way.

I will give this guy credit…the only thing he did that was at all intelligent in this encounter was avoiding my pet peeve when dealing with these fools by actually come up with an appropriate greeting that did not start with or use at any point the word *HEY*.

That’s probably what saved me from taking his picture and a picture of his number plate and swearing out a complaint of criminal trespass as his company was told multiple times prior to his arrival that they were no longer welcome on my property and I never wanted to see or hear from them again.

But at that point, I’m blowing past his greeting and pointing out the evidence that he and his solicitation were not at all welcome:

• The dogs barking their heads off at you!
• The dogs showing you their heineys!
• Me looking out the door and then doing the same!
• And if that’s not enough, look down at that doormat and comprehend the message it’s trying to convey!

So using the presumed capacity for reason and the above bits of evidence, is there *ANYTHING* that is coming close to indicating you are welcome to disturb my home in any way whatsoever?

His company was a source of pain and misery for thirty years…so much so that I don’t really want to spend one more minute of my life ever dealing with them again.

If any of their salespeople step foot past that mailbox and dare to ring the doorbell, they will have had plenty of notice that I’m going to do my level best to see that they’re prosecuted for trespass to the fullest extent of the law.

I’ve been completely over them for almost two years and will never willingly do business with that company again.

Shouldn’t that be clear enough even for these people with negative learning curves to comprehend and just leave my home and it’s occupants in peace?

I do believe I’ve made my position on that as crystal clear as I possibly can without resorting to pictures with stick figures and arrows.