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You might have noticed a recurring theme of “adulting sucks” in the previous posts when it comes to Nicholas and his impending driving being inflicted upon the driving public.

One last obstacle remains…surviving the DMV licence examiners!

Visits to DMV’s licence offices are often such a joy and the weather certainly seems to be setting the mood alternating between brooding and overcast to dropping a fair heap of rain!

We’ve armed Nicholas with as many documents as we possibly can and now it’s up to the examiners what they’re going to subject him to in his quest for a Class C regular driving licence. Nicholas was kind of a late bloomer to this driving thing and only completed driver’s education last year and had his level 1 permit for about nine months.

So here we are and Nicholas is into the queue. And almost immediately he’s waving me over to where he’s standing with the examiner. She wanted me to add the registration that wasn’t listed in the set of required documents to the Pile O’ Documents ™. Ah, could have been worse…now he’s off into the belly of the beast on his own as I retreat to the pilot’s seat of the Traverse.

This process is *SO* exciting…let my flight engineer show you exactly how exciting it is for him:

Yeah…he’s nailed it. So I’m left with amusing myself at the antics of the other people dealing with the gatekeepers to the inner sanctum of the office in the variable length queue right in front of me.

So, here we go with the play-by-play… 🙂

• The first contestant is an elderly lady clutching a number plate and registration and I truly feel for her because I know what’s about to happen…she’s going to get the heave-ho to head down to the DMV tags agency further down Atlantic Av from where we’re sitting. For those dear readers who aren’t familiar with the NC DMV…they’ve split their primary functions between the licence offices (staffed with licence examiners who are state employees) and the separate tags agencies (staffed by contractors who aren’t state employees but often act like they are!). The reason for this seemingly bizarre state of affairs is somewhat complicated and I’ll have to save it for another post.
• The queue is really starting to stack up now (got here at the right time!) and now contestant #2 is also bounced from the queue toward the tags agency. This takes a bit longer than one would have expected as the disappointed customer doesn’t seem too conversant in English.
• The next candidate tries to do the shake and bake on the licence examiner and pleading for mercy for not having an appointment but she’s having absolutely none of that! Several pieces of paper taped to many windows fronting this office clearly say “by appointment only” and whilst I can sympathize with how hard it is to actually get a timely appointment, it’s not impossible.
• The person behind Mr Shake and Bake should have taken a clue because the same licence examiner boots him for the exact same reason…no appointment! BOING!
• What do we have here?!? Someone appears to be completely prepared with their documents ready for inspection and has the almighty appointment. She passes Checkpoint Charlie with flying colours…wouldn’t you know, she’s a NURSE! 🙂
• Wow…the lady behind her is also on the ball and also quickly makes it past the gatekeeper and into the office. We might have a three person winning streak here…
• And one dared to dream too high…this one missed the requirement that the DL 123 proof of insurance form issued by his agent needs to be printed out but the examiner is looking upon him kindly and suggests that his agent fax a copy to their office by handing him a business-card sized slip of paper with their office fax machine number. You get the impression they’ve had that happen before?
• As Mr DL 123 stands aside, here’s a gentleman trying his luck with a matrícula consular from the Mexican consulate and that’s not going to fly so he gets bounced from the queue with a mighty BOING but doesn’t leave the premises in hopes of finding his way inside despite the documentation problem!
• Insurance agent moved pretty quickly which sends Mr DL 123 inside and now our Mexican friend is back trying his luck with a passport. Unfortunately, that passport does not have a I-94 visa stamp showing lawful entry into the United States through a Customs and Border Patrol checkpoint. And if he thinks the Mexican Consulate on the other end of town is going to turn and burn one of those for him, he’s got another think coming…and he’s finally leaving. I truly feel for him but if you’re ever crossing the border, the I-94 form/visa is essential to eliminate additional headaches from what is already a fraught process to begin with!
• Oh, *THIS* looks like it’s going to be fun…a guy takes one look at the queue and decides that waiting his turn isn’t for him so he tries to sneak past the gatekeepers on the other side of the door. Unfortunately for him, the shorter of the two gatekeepers catches him instantly and tells him in no uncertain terms that is bang out of order and that his choices are simple: take his place at the end of the queue that just got even longer or take his happy crack somewhere else. Surprisingly, he chooses option #2…
• Ah, here’s a licence examiner coming out and it looks like a Muslim lady is going to actually have to take the road test. The prevailing weather conditions were such that not even the cones were in play so I didn’t think they were doing road tests at all but it looks like she’s going to get the check ride.

I don’t have a lot of time to ponder her fate as Nicholas comes out the door…and he has successfully navigated the DMV bureaucracy and has his driving licence!

OK, he has a paper slip until the central driving licence facility produces the plastic one but the slip doesn’t have the gold star signifying REAL ID so I send him back inside to quickly confirm they are actually issuing him a REAL ID (after all, that’s why we went through documentation hell in the first place!).

The examiners inside do confirm he’s getting a REAL ID (he did with his permit last October but the paper copy didn’t have the gold star back then). I can understand why they might not want to print it on a temporary paper document that’s printed in monochrome anyway but honestly, if someone mistakes the paper licence as a REAL ID compliant form of identification, there are much larger problems afoot like your security is hopelessly incompetent or just doesn’t care.

However, that’s not our problem for today…he’s legal and now it’s time to make the dreaded call to dramatically increase the insurance bill.

Surprisingly, he didn’t have to sit any examinations at all nor do the check ride (which we already figured he qualified for the waiver)…not even the road sign/vision test. Our theory was that he had just done that nine months prior and there wasn’t any point in testing him again as the likelihood there were significant changes to his situation was near enough to nil.

Now the fun really begins…finding him a ride of his own (mostly) that won’t require a mortgage in this automotive market with low supply and high demand. Which sucks. 🙁