There are times that I genuinely think I’ve seen it all when it comes to door-to-door stupidity flogged by solicitors.
Between the bountiful buffet of bovine faeces or the gratuitous insults from them if they even are granted a rare audience, I’ve seen quite the continuum of appalling behaviour from these people I’d just as soon never have darken my doorstep.
But I’ll confess that nothing prepared me for what arguably has to be the most fascinating sales technique I’d ever seen in my life.
Mind you, this was the second time this company decided to bother me in the span of about six hours. The first was when I was in the midst of a crisis where this website was for all intents and purposes dead as a doornail which for some strange reason seemed to be far more important to me at the time.
I did have a minute to go from The Nerdery to look out the narrow window and they appeared to be from some window replacement company…so in other words, not important or useful at all.
This guy’s situational awareness seemed to be *ZERO* because I’m literally standing two metres away from him clearly in view of that window and he’s looking at everything *EXCEPT* the door. Most of his time was spent looking down at and fiddling with his phone which I’d agree was probably a more interesting use of his time.
I watched him for about two minutes and then he buggered off and met up with his mate in the cul-de-sac so I figured I’d probably be visited by the other guy later today.
Fast forward six hours and quelle surprise to hear the doorbell and knocking, neither of which were actually necessary for my day.
At this point, the website had been recovered and I was running some backups so that if it went to hell again, recovery would be far less painful so I figured I’d see if it was the same crew coming round to flog new windows at me even though the ones I have are perfectly fine.
I get to the door and look out the narrow window and there was no one in front of the door which was surprising considering it only took me 30 seconds to get from my chair in front of MALEFICENT to the window.
Hmmmm….it’s been a while since I’ve had the ding-dong ditch done to me.
Decades, in fact!
I then saw some movement from behind one of the three pedestals that support the porch roof and lo and behold if it wasn’t the other solicitor I’d seen with the first one earlier that day.
That has to be the most bizarre sales technique I’ve ever seen in my life and I genuinely would have loved to ask what the thought process was but he left after playing hide-and-seek (not too well!) and common sense dictated that I not open the door and ask the obvious question:
“Who in the hell would be stupid enough to open their door to someone hiding behind a roof support column?”
Hello! Home invasion much, eh?
If that’s truly his technique, then I really have to question if he’s truly in the right line of work because I can’t imagine that it’d be at all successful and frankly more than a little bit stupid in a state which takes a much more lax interpretation of the limits of the Second Amendment than many other states.
Anyone with a modicum of martial arts training could have them on the deck (if not worse) given their appalling lack of situational awareness and common sense.
Hide-and-seek door-to-door sales solicitations.
What will these bozos come up with next?